If I only had a clue…

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They Jiggle and They Hurt…

Boobs suck!

Of course, this goes against the Male DNA code, but really, who cares. Just yesterday I found out how little I know about boobs. Not surprising as I play on the hetero team, but still, a bit shocking nonetheless.

Let’s take this back a bit and give you some context for my ramblings. I was a 32 B/C for most of my life. I remember days of padded bras and duck tape in the efforts to attract the attention of men. And, I remember days of working out, running and just plain goofing off with no bra and no worries. My biggest concern was a cool breeze.

Then, I was blessed with 2 beautiful children…and, a permanent increase in bra size. Now, I’m a 36 B/C and seriously, I’ve wanted a boob job for 3 years…a reduction that is. Why???

Because they JIGGLE and they HURT!!!!

I can’t workout, run or goof off with the kids without extra support. And, going without a bra, well those days are over. The truth of the matter is that the increase of my breasts has been a literal pain in the bouncing chest region for years and I’ve got a penny jar slowly collecting funds to buy these suckers down.

BUT, I learned exactly how easy I have it yesterday. My girlfriend (she gave me permission to write about her but we’ll keep her name anonymous anyway) has a size F, she might have even said Double F. Now, I had no idea that there was a size F bra, but in reality this isn’t too surprising. It’s only 2 sizes up from D.

What is Shocking…. a size L…

YES, I said L, that’s the twelfth letter of the alphabet. 12 sizes up that you never see in the store. I feel really sorry for someone that has a size L. It must hurt. In Fact, “L” got a boob job and was ecstatic to be reduced to a DD…which would easily fall into a nightmare category for me.

Even an “F” had me a bit freaked out. I think health insurance should cover anyone who wants to reduce the craziness of having to lug anything larger than a D around.

For me, the penny jar is still in operation and when it’s full the 36 C’s I’m lugging around are getting chopped.

March 16, 2009 - Posted by amy | Life | , , | 17 Comments

17 Comments »

  1. I’m right there with you. I had no idea how good I had it in my “flat-chested” days.

    Comment by Charity | March 16, 2009

  2. Amazing, the things we don’t know… How often do we have to lose something, or in this case, gain something to find out that we had it great!!!

    Comment by amyleigh11 | March 16, 2009

  3. i agree! i am a 36c/d and would love a reduction! i’m pretty sure that won’t be happening though. i don’t think i could convince my husband! i don’t think he would care so much if they were smaller…it’s the surgery he wouldn’t go for i think!

    Comment by natalie | March 16, 2009

  4. I never realized what a problem boobs were.

    Comment by Mocha Dad | March 16, 2009

  5. only a problem if you have them… but I had no idea what a problem they were for some women and I’m one of them.

    Comment by amyleigh11 | March 16, 2009

  6. Glad I’m not the only 36 who thinks THAT is a problem. I feel for anyone who has anything bigger than a D!

    Comment by amyleigh11 | March 16, 2009

  7. I’m pregnant with my third right now and I forgot how much they change in the first trimester. In general, I’ve gone up in size too and it’s not as fun as some ladies might think! ; )

    Comment by Elaine | March 16, 2009

  8. I always laugh when someone says they can’t wait to get pregnant and get bigger boobs!

    Comment by amyleigh11 | March 16, 2009

  9. I’m good with my size 36A but please God, the perkiness, I want the perkiness

    Comment by Jessica Bern | March 16, 2009

  10. LMAO

    Comment by amyleigh11 | March 16, 2009

  11. Mine went back to the size they were before kids (a 36 C) but OH the jiggles. They never used to jiggle. It’s a pain in the butt waking up to find my boob under my armpit!

    Comment by Andrea's Sweet Life | March 16, 2009

  12. The grass really IS always greener! I spent my younger years wanting to smoosh the hell out of my 36 C boobs so that I wouldn’t look as “fat”. Now that I appreciate my ta tas and want them to salute the sun, they just want to kiss my knees.

    Comment by Jenny Runkel | March 16, 2009

  13. I too am part of the big busted babes. I was a 34C pre-children. They seemed to deflate after breastfeeding my first two; then after #3 and last they got bigger!! Don’t feel too sorry for those of us who are 34 DD; my hubby says people pay big bucks for chests like ours.
    I did, however, splurge on a lift a few years back so I no longer remind myself of that song “Do your ears hang low…”
    Love who you are!!

    Comment by Tami | March 16, 2009

  14. see latest comment…do yours remind you of that song??? I can’t stand the fact that I’m starting to look like the old ladies who have boobs comin out fo their belly buttons.

    Comment by amy | March 17, 2009

  15. I was an early bloomer, so I never wanted anything more than what I had – if that. Ultimately – I leveled out at a smaller size (B) by 7th grade. But those first couple of years of looking like a teenager when my friends looked like cute little tweens was enough to put me off boobs forever. Now I have friends who lament the decrease in size post pregnancy. I, on the other hand was thrilled. So I guess it all worked out in the end.

    Comment by Kate Coveny Hood | March 17, 2009

  16. I always feel bad when I see early bloomers. It wasn’t a problem for me, but some of my friends had it rough.

    Comment by amy | March 17, 2009

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